Friday, April 5, 2013

Five years

This got me thinking....

So really, when I think about it, nothing has changed. And nothing will change. All of my life I have dreamt of being happy, and I am. The greatest part is that my life is (hopefully) far from over, so I get to continue on this path to happiness. The exciting part is figuring out what that happiness will look like along the way.

At the end of the month, I'll be attending my five year college reunion. Yes, I'm still that young, but it truly amazes me how much time has passed.

Five years ago, I was a hot mess. No driver's license, no place to live and no job. I was still grappling with my anxiety disorder, trying to figure out why my brain made me cry.

So much has changed. I've changed. I went to therapy (best/hardest decision), struck out on my own, built a partnership with my now husband, was unemployed for two years, struggled with working two jobs to keep a roof over our heads and got married.

I can really relate to wanting to be happy, having that be your goal in life. For so long, my goal was to survive the next day and the next and the next. And these days, I really am happy. Sure, who wouldn't want more money/free time? But I have love in my life and I wake up knowing that I can make my life whatever I want, as corny as that sounds. I didn't have that option for so long and to have it now, for the rest of my life, is a beautiful gift.

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